DEAR SIR OR VAGINA
WITH LOVE FROM JAGGED LITTLE DYL

vaginas leak eggs, mammaries leak milk, it's ludicrous to think that females were designed to be mothers.

without gender-based olympic competitions, would there be any female champions?
without gender-based hot dog eating competitions, would there be any female champions?
without gender-based sports teams, would one gender serve as a "handicap" to the other gender?
without gender-based military requirements, would "g.i. jane" even be allowed to compromise the strength of the u.s. military?
without aspirations of world-dominance, would there be gender-based (female) infanticide in china?
my letters of complaint don't scorn, mock and belittle the token "Strongwoman" who can't budge a 100-pound barbell.
my letters scorn, mock and belittle masculine insufficiencies (gay "men") and the slave-race, too.

click it and see so many letters degrading and figuratively raping minorities

click it and enter to see so many essays ridiculing the facts about femininity
dear abby

blazavich still is looking mighty-fine to mr. dylan terreri. jeb blazavich, football-extraordinaire and future student of uga. wowowow. i would love to move near the university of georgia to be near him. if i were to move to athens, georgia, i'd build a house where i could make my driveway a road registered with the state. my address would be 1 eccentric avenue. or 91 josh lane.

i, dylan terreri the first, think johnstown is a college-town, much like athens, but terreri has never lived in johnstown. after becoming mighty-acquainted with the rest stop in laurel, he shared a house with marc nicodemus, whose mother knew someone in johnstown. marc's mother also had a flower-garden, and her name was mary. terreri is pretty sure that she tended to the garden(s) on the lovely court she lived on. she must've loved to plant rose flowers, daisy flowers, and sometimes she favored putting flowers into her heap of enriched dirt. i guess it'd be considered dirt-therapy (done dirt cheap). er, that's dirty deeds. ha.

speaking of therapy, mr. terreri would like to be therapist. not a physical therapist, and not a music therapist, not giving therapy to anyone at cleft music with issues of a cleft palate, not giving talk-therapy to little boys whose gender-identities have been "all shot to shit" by bullies who constantly regarded them with the word "grit" (a mixture between a "girl" and an "it"), but i would like to be therapist. i would like to be Therapist, and i would like to be TheRapist.

i am a little loney now, maybe that is why i want to force myself onto someone. oh, i meant lonely - i typed loney, i guess. when i get lonely, i drive. in 1997, i drove from jersey to jacksonville, all the way to dallas and san antonio. hutchins is south of dallas. i must've passed hutchins on my travels from dallas to austin. how lonely i was when i was a nomad, back in 1996, 1997 and 1998. so lonely...so loney, hutchins was probably just another place i'd been to without having any knowledge of where i was.

mr. terreri loves the mets, probably as much as a masculivoid named justin rudd povich. i love the mets because "mets" is "stem" spelled backwards, and i love j.d. stem. i think that whoever named "the mets" should have named it "the metz". like dogz, that piece of pc software i bought when i was in annapolis...i ran it on windows 95. i once knew a john metzger in high school. he was friends with mark, maybe mark meier, who had dark skin. i never thought he could be an african, it never crossed my mind, but i bet he was. he was in my accelerated english class...i mean, really, how many black people are accelerated at anything?

well, john metzger just may be married to a girl named julie. i'm not sure if john played baseball, i know mark did, but maybe if john metzger got onto "the mets," there'd be reason for the team to change their name to "the metz". john metz and julie metz.

sitting on a long beach chair in 1999, drinking from a can of miller beer, mr. terreri came up with the idea to name his website "jaggedlittledyl.com". i had been wanting a website since 1996 or 1997, i even registered "djterreri.com" in 1997, but nothing came of that because i was involved in "the retard home" of gallatin. it was full of brain-damaged retards, incompetent and nothing like me - yes, my 1990 brain-injury landed me in a childrens' hospital in 1992 or 1993 - maybe it was on the adolescent-ward of a depression hospital in jersey. anyway, "the retard home" in gallatin, which was a creation of loney hutchins, was where i did not belong. i was trapped there, the owner of the home, loney, made me sign a contract before i knew what i was getting myself into. the area i was in, from the cumberland river to dollywood, to the mountains...i guess they all were my tennessee hills for almost a year. i manipulated myself out, though, i cut my wrist and was sent to a hospital...was sent back to the retards and threatened to cut it again...was sent to a depression-home...escaped on our trip to church...called the police to help me...was sent back to the retard-home...was sent to a mental hospital, and a month later was set free because i was gone too long from the home and the douchebag who ran the place (loney hutchins, bastard extraordinaire) was not getting paid.

let me start again with this letter...

dearest abby

blazavich and all these thoughts about living on josh lane or eccentric avenue...all these thoughts are making mr. terreri feel empty. knowing of marc's mom's care for daisy flowers, as well as tulip flowers, terreri is feeling loney again. just as lonely as he was when he was driving all them time. just as lonely as he was when he frequented an ice-cream shop called "j.d. sundae" in phillipsburg. j.d. sundae was NOT owned by anyone named j.d. sundae. it wasn't even owned by anyone named j.d. stem, either. driving to j.d. sundae always seemed like the perfect way to pass time.

speaking of "the perfect way," i love that song by scritti cariddi. er, that's scritti politti. when that song came out, it was 1985 and i considered scott savarese to be my best friend. scott played football, but i don't know if he was friends with j.d. stem (or anyone named laura). scott was into drawing, into art, but i never was interested in the class called art

peck - well, hunt-and-peck - was probably the most useful class i took in high school. ok, the class wasn't called hunt-and-peck, it was called typing. ally peck may have been in my typing class, she was in my science class, and i guess everybody starts out typing with the "hunt and peck" method. i love arthur. i don't know how many times i've seen that movie. but i will always love arthur. tell me, mister maverick, is this your first time on the riverboat?

speaking of scott, i felt that when seth jabour came to my school, scott started drifting away from me. seth was friends with both of us, i did a lot with seth....i think i saw beetlejuice at his house when it was on video. beetlejuice had danielle davis in it. with that judd sister named winona, ryder trucks and danielle davis - er, geena davis - my dreams would come true. just packing up the stuff in my house and driving down south with my girls, geena and winona - er, wynonna - wow...i'd have a blast. danielle tucker would probably wanna hop onboard.

i have never seen rudd equipment company, though it is not far from me, but if i could say that i was just in rudd equipment's plant, it would probably make my day. though i am more interested in how those heavy pieces of equipment could improve my house and my property, i still would like to say that i was just in rudd equipment's plant. if i was just in rudd equipment's plant, i'd just wanna look at the equipment and fantasize of home-improvements. hmn...maybe, since "plant" is what "rudd equipment's" is describing, it should be rudd-equipment's plant. hyphenated.

i am not a freemason, i don't even know what one is. i once knew a kim eberstein, but i don't think he was a freemason. sometimes in basketball, i take freethrows and i am a freethrower. would i be a freemasoner if i was a mason? if kim eberstein was a freemason, would he (yes, kim was a man) be a freemasoner? maybe his indian-name would be "kim masoner". or "kim basinger". ha. i loved kim eberstein and greg bierly, both teachers in alexandria township middle school. er, greg beirly. i hate ei words, ie words. testosterone is manly, and greg had a hairy chest.

if jeff conway from "grease" and steve martin from "roxanne" got married, would jeff be jeff martin or would steve be steve conway? i am not writing this because i am trying to antagonize anyone who antagonized my mother, all i am doing is quoting chuck taylor and shouting the words "tu madre es facil" to all of the people of california. all i am doing is wishing (in no specific termino) for someone to understand that names are not personal property. if anyone needs help in understanding that names are not personal property, i have written many essays on the subject...they are posted on my website...but if anyone wants to contact someone named abby blazavich then i'm sure she'd help them understand that names are not personal property.

i have many facebook-names. "saltey lakey" comes to mind, as well as "scotty doo" and "michele jurysta". oh, "sheldon cooper," too. i have many facebook-accounts for my many drag-names, as well. "amanda green hawkins" and "connie" - i forget connie's last name. oh, well.

mr. terreri will always love the french man named jay d'urner. always will terreri be "charmed" by julie n. mcmahon. as for football-giants like tim t. ebow and matthe w. muchnok, well, something on me is forever "charmed" by pictures i see online of them. i remember the cover of a "rolling stone" magazine in the 80s, mcmahon was a football-giant. oh, jim mcmahon, maybe.

someone complained to mr. terreri about the scent of his flower-fragrance, he wears it when he goes out. someone else complained about their name showing up in google-results that are connected to terreri's website, and they sent emails to his parents...which antagonized his mother and had his father scaring him with threats of having to go to court. terreri is playing "the name game" for this reason - he likes to play "the name game" as much as he likes the book entitled "the ryn". i realize how negroes would call it "da ryn," seal ing and delivering their ebonic-stupidity to the masses, but it is called "the ryn" and it's one of the books i had never heard of until i went online.

michel'le was the name of the girl who sung "nicety" in the 1980s. o'bama could be an irish name, but i don't believe that the singer's name was michel'le o'bama. i don't think that negroes even exist in ireland. yes, michel'le is an negro, o'bama is irish, and that's enough said about that. i guess there could be a michel'le o'bama somewhere in existence - google it. i don't think google pays attention to punctuation in the middle of a word.

when he first drove from tennessee's town of nashville to maryland's town of frederick, terreri was 24 years old.

prince had a song called "the ballad of dorothy parker," but i don't think that joshua parker was related to dorothy. joshua's last name is lane, and i don't think that josh's middle name is dorothy's middle name more than i think it is dorothy's last name.

i don't think that either ann or nancy wilson is related to a girl i knew named lisa wilson. maybe so, but i'm sure that there are more ann wilsons and nancy wilsons than just the ones who sung 1990's "all i wanna do is make love to you". even uncommon names, like "dylan terreri" or "erin grapkoks" are not off-limits for anyone to take as their own. if i went to delaware valley regional high school, and i had a secret crush on dave steinmetz, i'm sure that i would be disappointed if i knocked on the door of the "dave steinmetz" who lives not 30 minutes away from me.

the same goes for that big, strong hunk of a football-coach named kevin stansberry. the same goes for matthew friel and patty friel, kelly o'brien and...well, my hero, josh lane. i'm sorry for writing about paul zimmerman, philicia rashad, or stevanne lusk...but who's to say if they are real or imaginary people? to me, they may be fake. to you, real. to me, real - to you, fake. nike may be a copyrighted name, but there's no infringement by my naming my son "nike terreri".

"larissa laurel" has her own website, and it has nothing to do with anyone named "laurel larissa". 2 live crew rapped about someone (or something) named "stiff peter," but "stiff peter" has nothing to do with a man named "craig peter". in my opinion, "peter" is as synonymous with "penis" as a big long "schneiderwind" is.

...just saying...

ergo, in no specific terms, i would like to reprise kelly siegel's/fraulein schneider's "so what" and bellow it out to any amigo who objects and spills their cheerios when they see their name on google being used on someone's rubio-supporting website.

mr. terreri thanks jeb bush because jeb didn't ask for his name to be taken from the "jagged little dyl" family of websites. he thanks john mendosa and johnny hendricks, as well as amanda green hawkins, duane petro, fran drescher, julie baker, scooby doo, danielle tucker, metal matt, joel borzotta, sheryl keiper, naren schreiner and pankaj mishr, matt drudge, billy joel, snow patrol (featuring patrick castanos and steve guttenberg), louise veronica ciccone, kevin hammerstone, seth and zsa zsa jabour, sanene talcott, matthew wayne shepard, sir mix-a-lot, and josh lane ...but there is one person i cannot thank. so, after he squirts a bit of cologne that smells like a daisy, terreri will just end his letter.

mr. dylan terreri, i
dr. sheldon cooper, ii
the kings of inappropriate letter-writing at dearsirorvagina.com

click it and see so many letters degrading and figuratively raping minorities

click it and enter to see so many essays ridiculing the facts about femininity
.....
"When I'm hungry, I eat. When I'm thirsty, I drink. When I feel like saying something, I say it." - Madonna
www.jaggedlittledyl.com/essays